‘Take delight in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart.’ (Psalm 37:4)
I want to share two experiences here, where God has granted me the inmost desires of my heart. It is not anything material that I mean, but a desire to draw closer to Him.
One of them happened about seven years ago, and though I felt inspired to write and share about it many times, I had put it off – because I was not sure how to include all the details in a readable form, and also whether I would be able to convey the power of the experience in writing. But after the second experience which happened just a few days back, I decided to take time and put both of these in writing, asking the Holy Spirit to guide my thoughts and words. After all, it is He who moves and touches hearts…
1. About seven years ago was a time when I was not fully able to appreciate or understand the real presence of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. I knew for sure that Jesus was present in the Holy Eucharist, but I was not able to participate fully in Eucharistic adorations, or enjoy His presence during expositions of the Blessed Sacrament. I had a desire, a thirst, for a deeper understanding, and I used to pray for this grace often.
One evening during our vacation in Kerala, a procession from the nearby Jacobite church was passing by our home. Everyone except me was standing outside the front door to watch the procession, and I was busy inside the bedroom, arranging some clothes in the wardrobe. My sister-in-law called out to me and said, ‘Chechy, there is a priest also in the procession, carrying the Blessed Sacrament in a monstrance.’ I said ‘ok’, but still continued on with my work without joining them. After just a couple of seconds, I felt the sudden urge to run outside and join them, which I did.
But when I reached, the priest had already passed our gate, and was proceeding further ahead. My heart sank, but I stood on tip-toes and strained to look ahead. Suddenly, to my utter surprise, the priest took a few steps backwards, held up the monstrance, looked straight in my eye, and made the sign of the cross with it!
I was so deeply touched that my eyes filled up with tears of joy. For a few minutes after this, I was still pondering about what it was that made the priest take those few steps backwards, and extend the blessing to me the way he did? The picture of Zacchaeus came to my mind, trying to see Jesus from up the sycamore tree. I realized that today I was the Zacchaeus, trying to get a glimpse standing on my tippy-toes – and Jesus made sure He looked back to give me His blessing. I knew this was a little miracle He did just for me, because He knew of my desire to find Him in the Eucharist. I needed no further evidence that it was truly Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. Thank you, Jesus!
2. It was our sixteenth wedding anniversary, and we had decided to go for evening Mass at 6:15 with our three children. Every evening Mass at our church is preceded by rosary and adoration - and during this time a priest would be available for confessions as well. Being our wedding anniversary, I wanted to go for confession before the Mass, and so we started a little early from home.
We reached church at about 6pm, and my husband dropped us in front of the church and proceeded to park the car. We took our place in one of the front pews, and I kept looking back to see if my husband was coming – because my three-year-old wouldn’t let me go from his side unless my husband stayed with him. There were a couple of people waiting in line for confession, and I went and stood there for some time. Then I went outside to look for my husband and saw that he was still near the parking lot, attending a phone call. It was almost time for Mass, and I knew there wouldn’t be time for confession now. So I came back in. The priest also went from the confessional, because he was the one celebrating the Mass that evening.
I took my place in the pew, feeling sad that I was not able to make the confession as I had wished. I tried to console myself thinking that I will request father after the Mass was over- but still I was sad at heart, because my true desire was to make the confession before receiving communion. Soon my husband also joined us in our pew, and the choir started playing the music for the entrance hymn.
The main celebrant, along with the Parish priest, entered the altar to celebrate Mass. As the main celebrant walked to the altar, the parish priest stepped down from the side, walked up to me, and asked, ‘do you want to make a confession?’ Surprised at how this could be happening, I said ‘YES!’ and followed him to the confessional as the entrance hymn was going on.
At the end of the confession, I asked father, ‘Father, how did you know I wanted to make a confession?’ Because I was still surprised and unable to believe that the confession actually happened. Father said he had noticed me going out and coming back in, and sensed that I had wanted to go for confession. I thanked him and told him that it was our wedding anniversary, and that I was standing there feeling disappointed for not being able to have the confession as I had desired…
After my confession, father went and joined at the altar to celebrate Mass - the choir was in the last line of the entrance hymn, and it was time for the Mass to start. Perfect timing!
Throughout the Holy Mass I was feeling overwhelmed at the thought that God inspired the priest who was proceeding to celebrate Mass to come to me, and hear my confession! All because Jesus knew and wanted to grant the inmost desire of my heart - which was to receive Him after confession, on this special occasion.
Lucy
Showing posts with label Lucy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lucy. Show all posts
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
The Runaway Bunny
Wonder if any of you have read the children’s book titled ‘The Runaway Bunny’, by Margaret Wise Brown…
It is about a little bunny who wanted to run away. But no matter where he decided to go, his mother was always there - “If you run away, I will run after you. For you are my little bunny”.
I had loved reading this book to my older children (now 11 and 7) when they were smaller, and it was hidden away behind some bigger books in our bookshelf. The other day, 2 ½- year old Joel happened to fish it out and bring it to me to read. As I was reading it to him, the words of Psalm 139 flowed gently through my mind.
‘…Where shall I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast….’ (Psalm 139:7-10)
The beautiful, colourful illustrations in the book spoke to me like never before. The little bunny running away to all sorts of silly places; and the mother running after him, going out of her way, taking all the trouble, to reach him and be there – at all of those silly places.
I felt all warm and cuddly – because I could see myself clearly in the little bunny. And my heavenly Father, in the loving mother. It was truly a wonderful feeling, to be enveloped and overwhelmed thus, by the Father’s love.
I searched to see if the book was available online, but all I managed to locate was a link which showed a few of the first pages.
http://www.harpercollins.com/browseinside/index.aspx?isbn13=9780064430180
Yet another experience for me to understand our God, who uses every possible means to convey the depth of His love for us. Amazingly enough, this came at a time when I really needed a reassuring hug – and He just knew it! :)
I was surprised at how such an unassuming, small, children’s book, could speak so much to my heart about His love.
What an unconventional way of discovering God! And that’s exactly why I thought I should write it down and share it in this blog!
Praise God!
Lucy
It is about a little bunny who wanted to run away. But no matter where he decided to go, his mother was always there - “If you run away, I will run after you. For you are my little bunny”.
I had loved reading this book to my older children (now 11 and 7) when they were smaller, and it was hidden away behind some bigger books in our bookshelf. The other day, 2 ½- year old Joel happened to fish it out and bring it to me to read. As I was reading it to him, the words of Psalm 139 flowed gently through my mind.
‘…Where shall I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast….’ (Psalm 139:7-10)
The beautiful, colourful illustrations in the book spoke to me like never before. The little bunny running away to all sorts of silly places; and the mother running after him, going out of her way, taking all the trouble, to reach him and be there – at all of those silly places.
I felt all warm and cuddly – because I could see myself clearly in the little bunny. And my heavenly Father, in the loving mother. It was truly a wonderful feeling, to be enveloped and overwhelmed thus, by the Father’s love.
I searched to see if the book was available online, but all I managed to locate was a link which showed a few of the first pages.
http://www.harpercollins.com/browseinside/index.aspx?isbn13=9780064430180
Yet another experience for me to understand our God, who uses every possible means to convey the depth of His love for us. Amazingly enough, this came at a time when I really needed a reassuring hug – and He just knew it! :)
I was surprised at how such an unassuming, small, children’s book, could speak so much to my heart about His love.
What an unconventional way of discovering God! And that’s exactly why I thought I should write it down and share it in this blog!
Praise God!
Lucy
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
What a Friend We Have in Jesus!
A little something from my life this week that I felt inspired to share in this blog:
Roshan is now on an official trip to Amsterdam, and two days after he left, my son Daniel came down with fever and a few episodes of vomiting. The vomiting subsided soon, and I continued paracetamol for the fever. My prayer during the fever was that Jesus will be with him, comfort him and enlighten me to take care of him the right way. I didn’t pray that the fever would go away altogether – because, as we know, these sicknesses are all part of our life. He is there to comfort us, and that’s all we need; and I knew He will bring healing at the right time.
But at night, Daniel’s temperature didn’t come down much with the paracetamol – so I stayed up in bed all night, constantly feeling his hot forehead and giving him wet sponges to cool him down till it was time for the next dose. When it was time for a dose of Calpol around 4am, I was feeling very sleepy and tired – so I told Jesus:
‘OK - with this dose, you HAVE TO bring the temperature down. I am too tired to sit up now. I am going to give him the medicine, and go right to sleep – won’t even feel his temperature till I wake up next – so you BETTER do this.’ :)
And I gave Daniel the Calpol, making the sign of the cross on the forehead, and went to sleep - just like I had told Jesus. I could fall asleep easily because I really trusted He would do what I asked for. I woke up after 2 hours, and felt his forehead – it was completely cool, and I smiled to myself and said ‘thank you!’.
The next day, after Daniel was all better, I told Rachel (11 yrs) and Daniel (7 yrs) exactly what I had told Jesus, and they were surprised and amused. They giggled and laughed, and said ‘Can’t believe you talked to Jesus like that!’
We had a beautiful conversation on this then – and that’s what I wanted to share, to show how the Holy Spirit guided my words, so that the children were able to relate to the situation, and understand how Jesus can truly be our friend:
They said,
‘You must be joking – did you really say that? - In that tone, ‘BETTER do it…’ and ‘HAVE TO’..?’
‘Isn’t that quite rude, to talk to Jesus like that..?’
‘Why didn’t you speak politely?’ :)
I told them : I do have a DEEP love and respect and reverence for Jesus, but at the same time, I have a wonderful friendship with Him also – so I feel free to talk like that to Him. And I’m sure He enjoys that too, - see how readily he answered my request? Rather than just seeing Him as a God seated up in the heaven, Jesus really longs to be part of our lives, and He is waiting for us to share our everyday things with Him . And when we start doing that, we will thoroughly enjoy it and our friendship becomes even stronger…. We can go to Him and talk to Him just as we are – happy, sad, angry, sleepy – whatever.
And I told them that they could also train themselves to talk to Jesus everyday, so they would also come to enjoy this wonderful relationship.
Just a few hours before that Rachel had come to me all upset and almost in tears, saying how difficult she was finding it to learn a Hindi story that she had to… So connecting it with this, I told her: instead of just asking Jesus to help you learn it, talk to Him about it – just like you talked to me; and He will give you His words of comfort, and enlighten your mind as to how to handle it.
I could see that the children were really able to understand what I said, and were able to get an idea about the friendship I was talking about.
At the end of it, Daniel giggled again, saying, ‘Amme, but next time you talk to Jesus, speak just a bit more nicely’ !! :)
I am reminded of the song,
‘What a friend we have in Jesus,
all our sins and griefs to bear
What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer!’
And I realized how important it is to keep talking to our children about Jesus and help them befriend Him, so they can enjoy His presence to the fullest in their little lives - let's help them discover their True Friend!
Thank you, Jesus!
Lucy
Roshan is now on an official trip to Amsterdam, and two days after he left, my son Daniel came down with fever and a few episodes of vomiting. The vomiting subsided soon, and I continued paracetamol for the fever. My prayer during the fever was that Jesus will be with him, comfort him and enlighten me to take care of him the right way. I didn’t pray that the fever would go away altogether – because, as we know, these sicknesses are all part of our life. He is there to comfort us, and that’s all we need; and I knew He will bring healing at the right time.
But at night, Daniel’s temperature didn’t come down much with the paracetamol – so I stayed up in bed all night, constantly feeling his hot forehead and giving him wet sponges to cool him down till it was time for the next dose. When it was time for a dose of Calpol around 4am, I was feeling very sleepy and tired – so I told Jesus:
‘OK - with this dose, you HAVE TO bring the temperature down. I am too tired to sit up now. I am going to give him the medicine, and go right to sleep – won’t even feel his temperature till I wake up next – so you BETTER do this.’ :)
And I gave Daniel the Calpol, making the sign of the cross on the forehead, and went to sleep - just like I had told Jesus. I could fall asleep easily because I really trusted He would do what I asked for. I woke up after 2 hours, and felt his forehead – it was completely cool, and I smiled to myself and said ‘thank you!’.
The next day, after Daniel was all better, I told Rachel (11 yrs) and Daniel (7 yrs) exactly what I had told Jesus, and they were surprised and amused. They giggled and laughed, and said ‘Can’t believe you talked to Jesus like that!’
We had a beautiful conversation on this then – and that’s what I wanted to share, to show how the Holy Spirit guided my words, so that the children were able to relate to the situation, and understand how Jesus can truly be our friend:
They said,
‘You must be joking – did you really say that? - In that tone, ‘BETTER do it…’ and ‘HAVE TO’..?’
‘Isn’t that quite rude, to talk to Jesus like that..?’
‘Why didn’t you speak politely?’ :)
I told them : I do have a DEEP love and respect and reverence for Jesus, but at the same time, I have a wonderful friendship with Him also – so I feel free to talk like that to Him. And I’m sure He enjoys that too, - see how readily he answered my request? Rather than just seeing Him as a God seated up in the heaven, Jesus really longs to be part of our lives, and He is waiting for us to share our everyday things with Him . And when we start doing that, we will thoroughly enjoy it and our friendship becomes even stronger…. We can go to Him and talk to Him just as we are – happy, sad, angry, sleepy – whatever.
And I told them that they could also train themselves to talk to Jesus everyday, so they would also come to enjoy this wonderful relationship.
Just a few hours before that Rachel had come to me all upset and almost in tears, saying how difficult she was finding it to learn a Hindi story that she had to… So connecting it with this, I told her: instead of just asking Jesus to help you learn it, talk to Him about it – just like you talked to me; and He will give you His words of comfort, and enlighten your mind as to how to handle it.
I could see that the children were really able to understand what I said, and were able to get an idea about the friendship I was talking about.
At the end of it, Daniel giggled again, saying, ‘Amme, but next time you talk to Jesus, speak just a bit more nicely’ !! :)
I am reminded of the song,
‘What a friend we have in Jesus,
all our sins and griefs to bear
What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer!’
And I realized how important it is to keep talking to our children about Jesus and help them befriend Him, so they can enjoy His presence to the fullest in their little lives - let's help them discover their True Friend!
Thank you, Jesus!
Lucy
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Jesus's prayer for us
Personal reflection based on John 17 (Jesus prays for himself and his disciples):
Whenever I have read this passage I have got a little bored, feeling that Jesus just was saying the same things over and over again as He prays for His disciples. I knew it was definitely much more than that, and so this day I prayed that the Holy Spirit may shed His light to enable me understand the passage and the depth of what Jesus wanted to convey. These are the train of thoughts that came to my mind:
When we speak to someone about something that we feel so strongly about, don’t we do this too – say the same things over and over again? As we pour our hearts out to someone, don’t we find ourselves desperately trying to phrase and rephrase the exact same statements, just wanting to make sure they really understood us? The depth of Jesus’s prayer slowly started to dawn on me. Here is the gist of what He says – ‘I was here with them till now, but now I am going. But they are here (in the world). Father, protect them and keep them from the evil one.’ Jesus knows what it is like to be in this world; He knows what His people will have to go through. So He tells His heavenly Father to keep them, to protect them - over and over again.
I thought about how worried we parents are, as we send our children to school for the very first time. We are concerned about how well they will eat; whether they will know when it’s time to go to the bathroom; whether they will miss us; whether they will cry; whether the teachers will know how to handle them, so on and so forth. The children, on the other hand, may not worry as much, because it’s their first time and they really don’t know what to expect. This thought helped me relate to Jesus’s concern about us as He prays this prayer. He knows what it’s like, and so He prays with all sincerity…He has been through every single emotion/situation that we have or will have to go through in this world. To start with, He didn’t even have a proper place to be born! He has experienced temptations, was scoffed, neglected and falsely accused; He has experienced great stress and tension – so great that his sweat became drops of blood!; He has carried the heavy cross and endured great physical pain and suffering all the way up to the cross on Calvary. He knows what awaits us, and He prays to the Father for our protection.
In His prayer, Jesus says ‘When I was with them I protected them in your name that you gave me, and I guarded them...’ (v 12) Yes, Jesus walked with His disciples and protected them while He was here…By His daily life, He taught the disciples and let them learn from Him….... A few examples from His life came to my mind – examples through which he conveyed valuables lessons on forgiveness, and on listening to the Spirit’s promptings in the various situations we face:
- The story of Zacchaeus (Luke 19), the tax collector. He climbed up the sycamore tree to see Jesus. He had not repented, not turned away from his wrong ways – not yet. He was up in the tree just as he was. He just wanted to see Jesus. Jesus did not wait for him to come ask for forgiveness; Jesus did not wait for him to repair his wrongs. Jesus sensed his repenting heart, and went out to him rightaway – accepted him just as he was. Jesus, our master, set an example for the kind of forgiveness that He asks of us – as soon as we sense a repenting heart, we are called to go forth and forgive, accept and embrace. Isn’t that much higher than the forgiveness that the world teaches us?
A few instances where Jesus speaks out against wrong practices and outlooks:
- When the scribes and Pharisees accuse the disciples of not washing hands, Jesus explains to them that ‘It is not what enters one's mouth that defiles that person; but what comes out of the mouth is what defiles one.’ (Mathew 15:11)
- When the scribes and Pharisees accuse Jesus of healing a man’s withered hand on Sabbath, he explains to them that ‘it is lawful to do good on Sabbath’ (Luke 6)
- On yet another occasion that he’s accused of healing on Sabbath, He says ‘Hypocrites! Does not each one of you on the sabbath untie his ox or his ass from the manger and lead it out for watering? This daughter of Abraham, whom Satan has bound for eighteen years now, ought she not to have been set free on the sabbath day from this bondage?" (Luke 13:16)
In these situations, we see Jesus offering explanations to the scribes and Pharisees, helping them understand the truth. When we come across situations that we can use to offer counsel and advice and thus bear witness to Jesus, we are called to stand up and do it, trusting the Holy spirit to guide and enlighten us.
And then, the picture of Jesus in the Sanhedrin came to my mind. As Jesus is questioned by Pilate, we see him keeping quiet (Mat 27:13, 14) – not speaking out against the injustice, not even defending himself! Here, Jesus teaches us that there are times when we need to speak out, and times when we need to keep quiet...(...how desperately we need the grace to discern this!) When we stay close to Jesus, we will learn to recognize and listen to His voice in all that we say and do. We will be able to discern His will, and think, speak and do according to the prompting that the Holy Spirit puts in our hearts.
- ‘I gave them your word,…’ (v14) : This verse got me thinking again about our children at school…: we feel comforted when we think about the instructions/advice that we have given them. We know we have told them to go ahead and use the bathroom when they need to, and not wait too long; We know we have told them that we will be there to pick them up right after school – ie; we find comfort/solace in the fact that we have ‘given them our words’. And we hope they will remember those words. Just the same way, Jesus says to the Father ‘I gave them your Word’. He hopes that we will remember them, and use them. He hopes that we will read and keep the Word of God close to our hearts, and will be able to use it as we live this life in the world. He knows that this Word that is sharper than a two-edged sword is all we need to fight the evil one. ‘Consecrate them in the truth. Your word is truth.’ (v 17) Jesus prays to the Father to keep us holy , keep us sacred (consecrate) in the truth, which is the word of God.
Think about how happy we feel when someone says that they will pray for us. If so, how great should our joy be, knowing that Jesus our Lord and Savior prays for us to God the Father!
Praise God for his unending love for us!
Lucy
Whenever I have read this passage I have got a little bored, feeling that Jesus just was saying the same things over and over again as He prays for His disciples. I knew it was definitely much more than that, and so this day I prayed that the Holy Spirit may shed His light to enable me understand the passage and the depth of what Jesus wanted to convey. These are the train of thoughts that came to my mind:
When we speak to someone about something that we feel so strongly about, don’t we do this too – say the same things over and over again? As we pour our hearts out to someone, don’t we find ourselves desperately trying to phrase and rephrase the exact same statements, just wanting to make sure they really understood us? The depth of Jesus’s prayer slowly started to dawn on me. Here is the gist of what He says – ‘I was here with them till now, but now I am going. But they are here (in the world). Father, protect them and keep them from the evil one.’ Jesus knows what it is like to be in this world; He knows what His people will have to go through. So He tells His heavenly Father to keep them, to protect them - over and over again.
I thought about how worried we parents are, as we send our children to school for the very first time. We are concerned about how well they will eat; whether they will know when it’s time to go to the bathroom; whether they will miss us; whether they will cry; whether the teachers will know how to handle them, so on and so forth. The children, on the other hand, may not worry as much, because it’s their first time and they really don’t know what to expect. This thought helped me relate to Jesus’s concern about us as He prays this prayer. He knows what it’s like, and so He prays with all sincerity…He has been through every single emotion/situation that we have or will have to go through in this world. To start with, He didn’t even have a proper place to be born! He has experienced temptations, was scoffed, neglected and falsely accused; He has experienced great stress and tension – so great that his sweat became drops of blood!; He has carried the heavy cross and endured great physical pain and suffering all the way up to the cross on Calvary. He knows what awaits us, and He prays to the Father for our protection.
In His prayer, Jesus says ‘When I was with them I protected them in your name that you gave me, and I guarded them...’ (v 12) Yes, Jesus walked with His disciples and protected them while He was here…By His daily life, He taught the disciples and let them learn from Him….... A few examples from His life came to my mind – examples through which he conveyed valuables lessons on forgiveness, and on listening to the Spirit’s promptings in the various situations we face:
- The story of Zacchaeus (Luke 19), the tax collector. He climbed up the sycamore tree to see Jesus. He had not repented, not turned away from his wrong ways – not yet. He was up in the tree just as he was. He just wanted to see Jesus. Jesus did not wait for him to come ask for forgiveness; Jesus did not wait for him to repair his wrongs. Jesus sensed his repenting heart, and went out to him rightaway – accepted him just as he was. Jesus, our master, set an example for the kind of forgiveness that He asks of us – as soon as we sense a repenting heart, we are called to go forth and forgive, accept and embrace. Isn’t that much higher than the forgiveness that the world teaches us?
A few instances where Jesus speaks out against wrong practices and outlooks:
- When the scribes and Pharisees accuse the disciples of not washing hands, Jesus explains to them that ‘It is not what enters one's mouth that defiles that person; but what comes out of the mouth is what defiles one.’ (Mathew 15:11)
- When the scribes and Pharisees accuse Jesus of healing a man’s withered hand on Sabbath, he explains to them that ‘it is lawful to do good on Sabbath’ (Luke 6)
- On yet another occasion that he’s accused of healing on Sabbath, He says ‘Hypocrites! Does not each one of you on the sabbath untie his ox or his ass from the manger and lead it out for watering? This daughter of Abraham, whom Satan has bound for eighteen years now, ought she not to have been set free on the sabbath day from this bondage?" (Luke 13:16)
In these situations, we see Jesus offering explanations to the scribes and Pharisees, helping them understand the truth. When we come across situations that we can use to offer counsel and advice and thus bear witness to Jesus, we are called to stand up and do it, trusting the Holy spirit to guide and enlighten us.
And then, the picture of Jesus in the Sanhedrin came to my mind. As Jesus is questioned by Pilate, we see him keeping quiet (Mat 27:13, 14) – not speaking out against the injustice, not even defending himself! Here, Jesus teaches us that there are times when we need to speak out, and times when we need to keep quiet...(...how desperately we need the grace to discern this!) When we stay close to Jesus, we will learn to recognize and listen to His voice in all that we say and do. We will be able to discern His will, and think, speak and do according to the prompting that the Holy Spirit puts in our hearts.
- ‘I gave them your word,…’ (v14) : This verse got me thinking again about our children at school…: we feel comforted when we think about the instructions/advice that we have given them. We know we have told them to go ahead and use the bathroom when they need to, and not wait too long; We know we have told them that we will be there to pick them up right after school – ie; we find comfort/solace in the fact that we have ‘given them our words’. And we hope they will remember those words. Just the same way, Jesus says to the Father ‘I gave them your Word’. He hopes that we will remember them, and use them. He hopes that we will read and keep the Word of God close to our hearts, and will be able to use it as we live this life in the world. He knows that this Word that is sharper than a two-edged sword is all we need to fight the evil one. ‘Consecrate them in the truth. Your word is truth.’ (v 17) Jesus prays to the Father to keep us holy , keep us sacred (consecrate) in the truth, which is the word of God.
Think about how happy we feel when someone says that they will pray for us. If so, how great should our joy be, knowing that Jesus our Lord and Savior prays for us to God the Father!
Praise God for his unending love for us!
Lucy
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
A simple lesson in faith…
Here’s a small incident which helped open my eyes a little bit more to understanding what Jesus meant by wanting us to be like children…...
Last Friday I had to take an auto from home to take our 3½ year old son Daniel to his playschool. I had to walk a small stretch of road with him to get to the main road, and then we stood there for a while waiting for an auto to pass by. The road to the school was pretty bad and bumpy and it was also dug up to lay some pipes. So no autos were passing that way, and those that did refused to go where we wanted to - and it was getting late for school.
After a while I spotted one auto coming our way and I told Daniel 'Let's ask Jesus to help us' and added a small prayer aloud for him to hear ,'Jesus, please let that auto stop'. When the auto came nearer, I realized that it already had a passenger. So I put my foot back and told Daniel, 'This won't stop, it already has someone in it'. But Daniel pulled me forward again holding my hand, and said,'But....but….Jesus…...'. He didn't complete the sentence because he didn't know how exactly to phrase it, but I knew that what he meant to say was, 'But didn't we tell Jesus?'. Feeling sorry that he was disappointed, I explained to him 'I know, we prayed to Jesus, but this auto can't stop because someone else is already in it....'
To my surprise, the auto stopped on the side and the driver told us to get in. The passenger, who was an elderly person, scooted to one side to make room. It was a 15-20 minutes ride to school, and that kind man had lost 10 minutes of his time in the process of taking the deviation to drop us. I was so grateful to both him and the auto driver, and when I thanked him, the man said 'not a problem. I only did what I would have done for my daughter'. Knowing auto drivers in Bangalore, it is truly a miracle that the auto driver and the man showed the kindness to stop for us.
Even though it's been awhile, the way Daniel said 'But….but… Jesus….' and the expression that went with it still stays fresh in my mind. With the amount of faith I had, I believed that Jesus could make the auto stop, provided it was unoccupied - whereas the child believed firmly that Jesus could stop the auto no matter what. Isn't that a HUGE difference?
Though a small incident, I believe it came with the big lesson for me that this is the kind of 'blind faith/trust' that Jesus asks of us. Praise God!
Lucy (Feb 2008)
Last Friday I had to take an auto from home to take our 3½ year old son Daniel to his playschool. I had to walk a small stretch of road with him to get to the main road, and then we stood there for a while waiting for an auto to pass by. The road to the school was pretty bad and bumpy and it was also dug up to lay some pipes. So no autos were passing that way, and those that did refused to go where we wanted to - and it was getting late for school.
After a while I spotted one auto coming our way and I told Daniel 'Let's ask Jesus to help us' and added a small prayer aloud for him to hear ,'Jesus, please let that auto stop'. When the auto came nearer, I realized that it already had a passenger. So I put my foot back and told Daniel, 'This won't stop, it already has someone in it'. But Daniel pulled me forward again holding my hand, and said,'But....but….Jesus…...'. He didn't complete the sentence because he didn't know how exactly to phrase it, but I knew that what he meant to say was, 'But didn't we tell Jesus?'. Feeling sorry that he was disappointed, I explained to him 'I know, we prayed to Jesus, but this auto can't stop because someone else is already in it....'
To my surprise, the auto stopped on the side and the driver told us to get in. The passenger, who was an elderly person, scooted to one side to make room. It was a 15-20 minutes ride to school, and that kind man had lost 10 minutes of his time in the process of taking the deviation to drop us. I was so grateful to both him and the auto driver, and when I thanked him, the man said 'not a problem. I only did what I would have done for my daughter'. Knowing auto drivers in Bangalore, it is truly a miracle that the auto driver and the man showed the kindness to stop for us.
Even though it's been awhile, the way Daniel said 'But….but… Jesus….' and the expression that went with it still stays fresh in my mind. With the amount of faith I had, I believed that Jesus could make the auto stop, provided it was unoccupied - whereas the child believed firmly that Jesus could stop the auto no matter what. Isn't that a HUGE difference?
Though a small incident, I believe it came with the big lesson for me that this is the kind of 'blind faith/trust' that Jesus asks of us. Praise God!
Lucy (Feb 2008)
Monday, November 30, 2009
The Wedding at Cana
Personal reflection based on John 2:1-11
Context: - Mother Mary finds out that the hosts at the wedding feast are out of wine, and secretly tells her son about it. Jesus asks, ‘What is that to us?’ (in another translation, ‘How does that concern us?’) :
I have always felt uncomfortable reading this part, because it sounded rather arrogant and disrespectful, and I didn’t want to think that Jesus was in fact disrespectful with His mother. So whenever I read this narration of the wedding at Cana, I just flipped by this verse fast and never stopped a moment to ponder about it.
Today as I felt inspired to read this account again, and I asked the Holy Spirit to take away the uneasiness from me, and help me understand the conversation between Jesus and His mother Mary in its truest sense.
The picture that rightaway came to my mind was of Jesus and Mary talking to each other with a mischievous smile on their faces. And instantly, the uneasiness drifted away from my mind, and I started seeing the special relationship between the mother and the Son. Let me try to explain this as best as I can.….:
When we go to a movie theatre with our children, they say, ‘Mummy/Daddy, there’s popcorn over there!’, without really saying that they want the popcorn. Fully realizing that they are asking for the popcorn, yet unwilling to admit it to them, we say, ‘So what?’, with a naughty smile. We want to wait and see if they ask the explicit question, ‘Can you buy the popcorn for us?’ Much the same way, when Mary tells Jesus ‘they are out of wine’, Jesus asks, ‘So what?’ (‘What is that to us?’). In the picture that I have in my mind, Mary looks back at Jesus with the same smile and raised eyebrows, conveying something like ‘You must be kidding!’ The people who heard this may not have understood, but this was their special conversation, and they understood each other, which was all that mattered. I loved this picture so much that I closed my eyes and savored this scene and their faces for just a little bit more.
Anyways mother Mary, fully aware of what her son is capable of, does not answer Jesus’s question of ‘so what?’. She just turns around and tells the workers, ‘Do whatever He tells you to do’. Mary doesn’t explicitly tell Jesus what she wants Him to do (may be she understood how different His ways are…), but in telling the workers ‘do whatever He tells you’, she hints to Jesus that whatever He does, he has to involve the workers/servers. Not the manager; not the headwaiter – the servers. Mary picked the lowly. Through mother Mary’s mediation/intercession, the servers were chosen to become part of this first miracle of Jesus. The very fact that Jesus takes this little hint from His mother and obeys it shows the utter respect and regard that He has for her – and now when I think back, there is not the slightest room at all for the thought about being disrespectful!
Also, just imagine the respect that mother Mary’s words must have had there at the wedding feast! The workers pay attention to her and obey what her son asks them to do – which, in the eyes of the world, would be utter foolishness. To fill the huge water jars with water and then pour some out and take to their boss? There would be no better reason for those workers to lose their jobs! But still, they obeyed it. It may be foolishness in the eyes of the world, but they didn’t care. They didn’t reason; they didn’t try to apply human logic to what was asked of them – they just obeyed. With them was present mother Mary - the prime example of humility and obedience to the will of God. The very presence of this blessed mother humbled their hearts – and made them capable of obeying Jesus. And God’s glory was revealed to them – they beheld the miracle of water turning to wine right before their eyes. ‘Nobody knew where the wine came from; but the workers knew.’
Let this be a lesson in humility for us. Let us submit our will to the will of God, and be ready to follow mother Mary’s example in saying ‘Here’s the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done to me according to Thy will’. Let us have the mindset of John the Baptist – He must increase, and I must decrease.
Here are a few more thoughts I had on this:
- When they ran out of wine, Jesus doesn’t provide them just enough to get through; He gives in abundance - 6 stone jars, each holding 20-30 gallons, filled upto the brim! How generous!
- The jars were filled with water upto the brim. But as long as it stayed in the jars, it was water. When poured out, it turned into wine. Water was good, but when poured out, it became wine - the good wine – better than what they had before. Just the same way, God has filled us with gifts and talents – and they are good. But when poured out for others, they get transformed into something on a much higher level.
- Mother Mary finds out by herself that the hosts were out of wine. The scripture doesn’t say that they entrusted her to take care of everything. All they did was invite Jesus and Mary to their homes. Like them, let us also invite Jesus and Mary into our homes. We don’t even need to tell her what we need. Just make sure we invite them – every single day, into our hearts, our homes, our lives. If our blessed mother is there, she will find out, tell her Son, and fill us up with what we lack.
From being a scripture passage that I tried to avoid contemplating on, this has now turned out to be one of my favorites. Especially the verse ‘what is that to us?’! Isn’t it amazing how the Holy Spirit sheds His light into our minds and takes the darkness away? I praise and thank God for this enlightenment.
Lucy (March 2005)
Context: - Mother Mary finds out that the hosts at the wedding feast are out of wine, and secretly tells her son about it. Jesus asks, ‘What is that to us?’ (in another translation, ‘How does that concern us?’) :
I have always felt uncomfortable reading this part, because it sounded rather arrogant and disrespectful, and I didn’t want to think that Jesus was in fact disrespectful with His mother. So whenever I read this narration of the wedding at Cana, I just flipped by this verse fast and never stopped a moment to ponder about it.
Today as I felt inspired to read this account again, and I asked the Holy Spirit to take away the uneasiness from me, and help me understand the conversation between Jesus and His mother Mary in its truest sense.
The picture that rightaway came to my mind was of Jesus and Mary talking to each other with a mischievous smile on their faces. And instantly, the uneasiness drifted away from my mind, and I started seeing the special relationship between the mother and the Son. Let me try to explain this as best as I can.….:
When we go to a movie theatre with our children, they say, ‘Mummy/Daddy, there’s popcorn over there!’, without really saying that they want the popcorn. Fully realizing that they are asking for the popcorn, yet unwilling to admit it to them, we say, ‘So what?’, with a naughty smile. We want to wait and see if they ask the explicit question, ‘Can you buy the popcorn for us?’ Much the same way, when Mary tells Jesus ‘they are out of wine’, Jesus asks, ‘So what?’ (‘What is that to us?’). In the picture that I have in my mind, Mary looks back at Jesus with the same smile and raised eyebrows, conveying something like ‘You must be kidding!’ The people who heard this may not have understood, but this was their special conversation, and they understood each other, which was all that mattered. I loved this picture so much that I closed my eyes and savored this scene and their faces for just a little bit more.
Anyways mother Mary, fully aware of what her son is capable of, does not answer Jesus’s question of ‘so what?’. She just turns around and tells the workers, ‘Do whatever He tells you to do’. Mary doesn’t explicitly tell Jesus what she wants Him to do (may be she understood how different His ways are…), but in telling the workers ‘do whatever He tells you’, she hints to Jesus that whatever He does, he has to involve the workers/servers. Not the manager; not the headwaiter – the servers. Mary picked the lowly. Through mother Mary’s mediation/intercession, the servers were chosen to become part of this first miracle of Jesus. The very fact that Jesus takes this little hint from His mother and obeys it shows the utter respect and regard that He has for her – and now when I think back, there is not the slightest room at all for the thought about being disrespectful!
Also, just imagine the respect that mother Mary’s words must have had there at the wedding feast! The workers pay attention to her and obey what her son asks them to do – which, in the eyes of the world, would be utter foolishness. To fill the huge water jars with water and then pour some out and take to their boss? There would be no better reason for those workers to lose their jobs! But still, they obeyed it. It may be foolishness in the eyes of the world, but they didn’t care. They didn’t reason; they didn’t try to apply human logic to what was asked of them – they just obeyed. With them was present mother Mary - the prime example of humility and obedience to the will of God. The very presence of this blessed mother humbled their hearts – and made them capable of obeying Jesus. And God’s glory was revealed to them – they beheld the miracle of water turning to wine right before their eyes. ‘Nobody knew where the wine came from; but the workers knew.’
Let this be a lesson in humility for us. Let us submit our will to the will of God, and be ready to follow mother Mary’s example in saying ‘Here’s the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done to me according to Thy will’. Let us have the mindset of John the Baptist – He must increase, and I must decrease.
Here are a few more thoughts I had on this:
- When they ran out of wine, Jesus doesn’t provide them just enough to get through; He gives in abundance - 6 stone jars, each holding 20-30 gallons, filled upto the brim! How generous!
- The jars were filled with water upto the brim. But as long as it stayed in the jars, it was water. When poured out, it turned into wine. Water was good, but when poured out, it became wine - the good wine – better than what they had before. Just the same way, God has filled us with gifts and talents – and they are good. But when poured out for others, they get transformed into something on a much higher level.
- Mother Mary finds out by herself that the hosts were out of wine. The scripture doesn’t say that they entrusted her to take care of everything. All they did was invite Jesus and Mary to their homes. Like them, let us also invite Jesus and Mary into our homes. We don’t even need to tell her what we need. Just make sure we invite them – every single day, into our hearts, our homes, our lives. If our blessed mother is there, she will find out, tell her Son, and fill us up with what we lack.
From being a scripture passage that I tried to avoid contemplating on, this has now turned out to be one of my favorites. Especially the verse ‘what is that to us?’! Isn’t it amazing how the Holy Spirit sheds His light into our minds and takes the darkness away? I praise and thank God for this enlightenment.
Lucy (March 2005)
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
A testimony to God's saving grace...
(Written down more than 4 years back, but posting now…)
Thursday, March 17, 2005, 6:45AM
This happened a few weeks back:
Went to bed on the Thursday night, after having decided to go for the 8am mass the next morning, which was 1st Friday.
I didn’t have a restful night, because Daniel was up many times due to a cold. So I felt lazy and tired as I woke up in the morning.
These are the series of thoughts that raced through my mind as I was lying in bed:
• Should I go to church now? I didn’t sleep well and I feel tired. Need I?
• It’s not a day of obligation ……
• What’s so special about Fridays anyways?
• And first Fridays – what’s so special about that?
• First Friday mass, adorations, etc – it’s all just a hype.
The very instant that the word ‘hype’ entered my mind, I knew it had come from satan. There is no other way that such an infrequently used word in my normal vocabulary (especially in regard to religious matters) should enter my mind – no doubt, I realized – satan had put it in there. Still feeling shocked at the thought that satan had almost got me, I jumped out of bed, headed straight for the bathroom, and in no time, I was ready for church.
For many days from then, this incident has been coming to me as a flashback – like the kind of flashback that plays in your mind when you have a narrow escape from an accident…
Today, I woke up at about 6, and came with Daniel to the living room to pray. The above incident again flashed back in my mind…
To think that Satan almost got me makes me shudder… What if I did not recognize satan’s voice and had given in? He would have really got me. I know that not going to church on a first Friday is not a sin – I myself am not able to go on all First Fridays – But having made the decision to go, and then changing my mind after giving in to satan’s excuses/justifications/lies – that very thought scares me still.. I feel that God really pulled me out of bed and got me ready – if I had just lay there, pondering over the thoughts and those justifications, I would have fallen. I really felt God’s saving hands literally pulling me out of bed and saving me from the clutches of the devil. This was a real encounter with ‘the evil one’, and I am very aware of satan’s presence now – and ever more aware of God’s saving grace…
I felt a strong inspiration to pray the ‘Our Father’…
When I came to the part ‘Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil’ , I found myself praying with all earnestness, like I’ve never ever prayed before – fully aware of my helplessness – fully aware of my need for God’s mercy…Fully aware that my God is a merciful, loving and saving God.
Here are the thoughts to which the Spirit led me….:
Satan acts in subtle ways which might seem very logical to us - and not in obvious ways that are easy for us to make out… So we need to pray earnestly – Lord, lead us not to temptation, but deliver us from evil.
I meditated on Jesus praying at Gethsamene. Jesus told his disciples ‘Keep watch and pray that you may not fall into temptation’. Another translation says ‘Get up and pray that you may not fall into temptation’.
Jesus wants us to keep watch/get up in both spiritual as well as physical sense. Spiritually, he tells us ‘keep watch - be constantly aware of the tempter’. In the physical sense, he tells us to watch out when our bodies are sleepy and idle and weak. There are times in the morning when we are really awake, but feel like lying down some more – those are the times that idle thoughts crowd into our minds. That is a dangerous time. That’s a time which satan can easily use to get us – to tempt us to do things against God’s will; to tempt us to refrain from doing the good things that we planned to do…
The story of the Gingerbread boy (an old folk tale) came to my mind…:
There was once an old man and woman who did not have any children. One day the woman said ‘I will make myself a gingerbread boy’. She makes gingerbread shaped like a boy and puts it in the oven. When she opens the oven door to see if it was baked, the gingerbread boy runs out the oven door and out of the house. The man and the woman run after him but the boy runs faster, saying ‘Run, run, run, as fast as you can! You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread boy’. The boy meets a cow, a horse, a pig, and some farmers along the way, and each of them shouts at him ‘Stop! I want to eat you!’. The boy manages to run away from each of them, saying ‘Run, run, run, as fast as you can! You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread boy’. The boy reaches a river which he has to cross to get away from them all, but he has to stop because he can’t get himself in the water. Then a fox comes by, and says ‘I’ll help you’. The fox asks the gingerbread boy to hop onto his back, and says he will take him across the river. The boy hops on. The fox starts walking with the boy on his back. As the water gets deeper, the fox asks the boy to hop onto his shoulder so he wouldn’t get wet, and then after a while, onto his head, and then finally his nose. Then, with a toss of his head, the fox gulps down the gingerbread boy.
Isn’t this really how the devil takes us for a ride? We may do a good job running away from the things that are obviously wrong. But the real wicked one awaits us with his most cunning, seemingly innocent plots. Much like the gingerbread boy, don’t we also, at times, run away from the loving God who made us? And when we are confronted with troubles and feel helpless, satan appears from nowhere and offers help. He puts forth action plans for us that are against the will of God and fills our minds with logical reasonings that justify his plans. He entices us to hop on for a cool and comfy piggyback ride – how scary!
It’s only our God’s grace that will enable us to break away from his bondage. It’s only God’s grace that will give us the wisdom to choose what is right. Let’s ask our merciful God to be our stronghold in times of trouble, and to set us free from the wickedness and snares of the devil…
When we lie down idle, our minds sometimes get crowded with negative thoughts and reasonings. These may lead us not just to do things that are bad or wrong, but may also pull us back from the good that we plan to do.
Some of the thoughts that satan frequently uses to get us:
- it is ok to talk ill of a person if the person doesn’t hear it…
- it is ok to not say the truth if it doesn’t hurt anyone…
- if everybody does it, it should be ok to do…
We need to force ourselves out of such thoughts. Cut it off. ‘Run run run as fast as you can’. But instead of saying ‘you cant catch me, I’m the gingerbread boy’, let’s not trust in ourselves, but in Divine Providence, in Divine mercy. Let’s say ’Run run run as fast as you can. You can’t catch me, for I belong to God’
I thought again about how, by God’s mercy, I was saved from the devil’s clutches. How God kept me from the evil one. In John 17, Jesus prays for his disciples - He prays to the Father ‘Keep them from the evil one’. I realized that Jesus prayed this prayer for me – He asked the Father to keep me from the evil one, and behold! I was kept from the evil one!
Praise God!
Lucy
Thursday, March 17, 2005, 6:45AM
This happened a few weeks back:
Went to bed on the Thursday night, after having decided to go for the 8am mass the next morning, which was 1st Friday.
I didn’t have a restful night, because Daniel was up many times due to a cold. So I felt lazy and tired as I woke up in the morning.
These are the series of thoughts that raced through my mind as I was lying in bed:
• Should I go to church now? I didn’t sleep well and I feel tired. Need I?
• It’s not a day of obligation ……
• What’s so special about Fridays anyways?
• And first Fridays – what’s so special about that?
• First Friday mass, adorations, etc – it’s all just a hype.
The very instant that the word ‘hype’ entered my mind, I knew it had come from satan. There is no other way that such an infrequently used word in my normal vocabulary (especially in regard to religious matters) should enter my mind – no doubt, I realized – satan had put it in there. Still feeling shocked at the thought that satan had almost got me, I jumped out of bed, headed straight for the bathroom, and in no time, I was ready for church.
For many days from then, this incident has been coming to me as a flashback – like the kind of flashback that plays in your mind when you have a narrow escape from an accident…
Today, I woke up at about 6, and came with Daniel to the living room to pray. The above incident again flashed back in my mind…
To think that Satan almost got me makes me shudder… What if I did not recognize satan’s voice and had given in? He would have really got me. I know that not going to church on a first Friday is not a sin – I myself am not able to go on all First Fridays – But having made the decision to go, and then changing my mind after giving in to satan’s excuses/justifications/lies – that very thought scares me still.. I feel that God really pulled me out of bed and got me ready – if I had just lay there, pondering over the thoughts and those justifications, I would have fallen. I really felt God’s saving hands literally pulling me out of bed and saving me from the clutches of the devil. This was a real encounter with ‘the evil one’, and I am very aware of satan’s presence now – and ever more aware of God’s saving grace…
I felt a strong inspiration to pray the ‘Our Father’…
When I came to the part ‘Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil’ , I found myself praying with all earnestness, like I’ve never ever prayed before – fully aware of my helplessness – fully aware of my need for God’s mercy…Fully aware that my God is a merciful, loving and saving God.
Here are the thoughts to which the Spirit led me….:
Satan acts in subtle ways which might seem very logical to us - and not in obvious ways that are easy for us to make out… So we need to pray earnestly – Lord, lead us not to temptation, but deliver us from evil.
I meditated on Jesus praying at Gethsamene. Jesus told his disciples ‘Keep watch and pray that you may not fall into temptation’. Another translation says ‘Get up and pray that you may not fall into temptation’.
Jesus wants us to keep watch/get up in both spiritual as well as physical sense. Spiritually, he tells us ‘keep watch - be constantly aware of the tempter’. In the physical sense, he tells us to watch out when our bodies are sleepy and idle and weak. There are times in the morning when we are really awake, but feel like lying down some more – those are the times that idle thoughts crowd into our minds. That is a dangerous time. That’s a time which satan can easily use to get us – to tempt us to do things against God’s will; to tempt us to refrain from doing the good things that we planned to do…
The story of the Gingerbread boy (an old folk tale) came to my mind…:
There was once an old man and woman who did not have any children. One day the woman said ‘I will make myself a gingerbread boy’. She makes gingerbread shaped like a boy and puts it in the oven. When she opens the oven door to see if it was baked, the gingerbread boy runs out the oven door and out of the house. The man and the woman run after him but the boy runs faster, saying ‘Run, run, run, as fast as you can! You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread boy’. The boy meets a cow, a horse, a pig, and some farmers along the way, and each of them shouts at him ‘Stop! I want to eat you!’. The boy manages to run away from each of them, saying ‘Run, run, run, as fast as you can! You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread boy’. The boy reaches a river which he has to cross to get away from them all, but he has to stop because he can’t get himself in the water. Then a fox comes by, and says ‘I’ll help you’. The fox asks the gingerbread boy to hop onto his back, and says he will take him across the river. The boy hops on. The fox starts walking with the boy on his back. As the water gets deeper, the fox asks the boy to hop onto his shoulder so he wouldn’t get wet, and then after a while, onto his head, and then finally his nose. Then, with a toss of his head, the fox gulps down the gingerbread boy.
Isn’t this really how the devil takes us for a ride? We may do a good job running away from the things that are obviously wrong. But the real wicked one awaits us with his most cunning, seemingly innocent plots. Much like the gingerbread boy, don’t we also, at times, run away from the loving God who made us? And when we are confronted with troubles and feel helpless, satan appears from nowhere and offers help. He puts forth action plans for us that are against the will of God and fills our minds with logical reasonings that justify his plans. He entices us to hop on for a cool and comfy piggyback ride – how scary!
It’s only our God’s grace that will enable us to break away from his bondage. It’s only God’s grace that will give us the wisdom to choose what is right. Let’s ask our merciful God to be our stronghold in times of trouble, and to set us free from the wickedness and snares of the devil…
When we lie down idle, our minds sometimes get crowded with negative thoughts and reasonings. These may lead us not just to do things that are bad or wrong, but may also pull us back from the good that we plan to do.
Some of the thoughts that satan frequently uses to get us:
- it is ok to talk ill of a person if the person doesn’t hear it…
- it is ok to not say the truth if it doesn’t hurt anyone…
- if everybody does it, it should be ok to do…
We need to force ourselves out of such thoughts. Cut it off. ‘Run run run as fast as you can’. But instead of saying ‘you cant catch me, I’m the gingerbread boy’, let’s not trust in ourselves, but in Divine Providence, in Divine mercy. Let’s say ’Run run run as fast as you can. You can’t catch me, for I belong to God’
I thought again about how, by God’s mercy, I was saved from the devil’s clutches. How God kept me from the evil one. In John 17, Jesus prays for his disciples - He prays to the Father ‘Keep them from the evil one’. I realized that Jesus prayed this prayer for me – He asked the Father to keep me from the evil one, and behold! I was kept from the evil one!
Praise God!
Lucy
Monday, November 16, 2009
Chosen to bless, not curse.
It was the diwali weekend, and there were crackers bursting all around us. By Friday evening it started getting really loud and we were wondering how our one month old Joel would react – he didn’t mind the ‘maala padakkams’ so much, but those singled-out extra-loud ones bothered and startled him, especially by night time. The moment I put him down on the bed, there would be a loud one and he would wake up. This went on for quite some time - startling him and making him wake up crying. The previous few nights had been quite tiring, as Joel couldn’t sleep because of a stuffy nose, and I was quite drained by Friday evening, just wanting to crash on the bed. Anyway I decided to wait patiently till 10 pm, because a notice in our apartment complex had said that loud crackers were not allowed beyond 10pm. So I looked forward to 10 O’clock, hoping that both of us would finally be able to get some sleep.
But it only got worse, with more and more of those extra-loud ones. I tried telling the security to request the offenders to comply with the notice that was put up, but the security guys didn’t have the guts to do that. After about 10:30, I could take it no longer. I just put the baby down on the bed, stepped out to the balcony and called out to one of our neighbours who was in action right in front, asking him to please stop the loud ones, not forgetting to remind him about the notice as well. He and his family obliged, and there was peace and calm for about 10 minutes.
Then again it started, and when I looked from our bedroom window, I could see a family down there, making all this noise and having a fun time. Again poor Joel was waking up crying and poor me was walking around with him, trying to pacify him – and the time was well past 11! Anger and irritation were welling up inside me, along with tiredness and sleepiness.
The very sight of them bursting the crackers made me so full of hatred, that I said this loud enough so I could hear myself : ‘One of those crackers should burst right on their faces and kill them’. Immediately the thought came to me, that what I just uttered was a curse. The next thought followed : ‘O, good – let me do it again.’ And this time I repeated what I had said earlier – consciously, deliberately and spitefully, fully knowing that it was a curse. It was something I had never done before in my life - and honestly, I felt proud of myself! – for a few moments.
And then came the next thought, like a slap on my face – ‘What did I just do? Can someone who knows Jesus say things like that?’ I myself was surprised that the word ‘Jesus’ could find its way to my mind, even amidst so much hatred and turbulence. I came to my senses. I closed my eyes and said St.Michael’s prayer three to four times in a row. Then I said the divine mercy chaplet, asking for God’s pardon and mercy on me. I even prayed sincerely for blessings on that family down there. I desperately wanted to reverse everything I had thought and said earlier. I could feel a flooding in of God’s peace. The crackers went on for some more time, but they didn’t bother me anymore. Joel also fell asleep.
The story doesn’t end here… The following evening was diwali celebration at the apartment complex, and Roshan had bought some no-noise stuff - sparklers and flower pots (‘kambithiri’, ‘poothiri’) – to light with the children. They went down and were enjoying lighting these with a friend’s family. One of the flowerpots suddenly caught fire and burst upon lighting - (must have been a faulty one – bcoz they are not supposed to burst), and a flame brushed close to Roshan’s face. They got a fright at first, but nothing had happened. Roshan came back and told me that it was divine protection that kept him safe - there were some parts of the burnt stuff stuck on his eyeglasses! Immediately I remembered (with shame and shock) what I had wished for the other family the previous night – the exact same thing could have happened to one of us now, if it had not been for God’s protection. It was a reminder and an example of God’s unconditional love and mercy and forgiveness….
All along the previous night, there was some part of the Bible coming to my mind, which said that we should never curse, only bless - but I had been shutting it off. I looked it up the next morning, and found it in Psalm 109:28 - ‘They may curse, but you will bless.’
It’s been more than a week now, but I have been thinking and reflecting on this a lot these days, and the verse ‘they may curse, but you will bless’ keeps coming to my mind – it says, ‘it doesn’t matter what others do, but you will do what I tell you to do’…….. ‘They may cheat, but you will not’; ‘They may gossip, but you will not’; ‘They may tell lies, but you will speak the truth’; …….. Yes, by being the chosen ones, isn’t it a privilege to be ordered around by the one who chose us? I love its commanding tone.
It is true, we have accepted the Lordship of Jesus in our lives - but now I also see how important it is to re-affirm this Lordship every single day - just to tell him over and over again that he does have the permission and right to hurry and rush to our rescue with his saving grace, when we get caught up in our weaknesses, like I was. When we entrust ourselves into his hands, he will somehow find his way through - however stubborn and turbulent our hearts may be at that time, like mine was…..
Praise God! Thank you, Jesus!
But it only got worse, with more and more of those extra-loud ones. I tried telling the security to request the offenders to comply with the notice that was put up, but the security guys didn’t have the guts to do that. After about 10:30, I could take it no longer. I just put the baby down on the bed, stepped out to the balcony and called out to one of our neighbours who was in action right in front, asking him to please stop the loud ones, not forgetting to remind him about the notice as well. He and his family obliged, and there was peace and calm for about 10 minutes.
Then again it started, and when I looked from our bedroom window, I could see a family down there, making all this noise and having a fun time. Again poor Joel was waking up crying and poor me was walking around with him, trying to pacify him – and the time was well past 11! Anger and irritation were welling up inside me, along with tiredness and sleepiness.
The very sight of them bursting the crackers made me so full of hatred, that I said this loud enough so I could hear myself : ‘One of those crackers should burst right on their faces and kill them’. Immediately the thought came to me, that what I just uttered was a curse. The next thought followed : ‘O, good – let me do it again.’ And this time I repeated what I had said earlier – consciously, deliberately and spitefully, fully knowing that it was a curse. It was something I had never done before in my life - and honestly, I felt proud of myself! – for a few moments.
And then came the next thought, like a slap on my face – ‘What did I just do? Can someone who knows Jesus say things like that?’ I myself was surprised that the word ‘Jesus’ could find its way to my mind, even amidst so much hatred and turbulence. I came to my senses. I closed my eyes and said St.Michael’s prayer three to four times in a row. Then I said the divine mercy chaplet, asking for God’s pardon and mercy on me. I even prayed sincerely for blessings on that family down there. I desperately wanted to reverse everything I had thought and said earlier. I could feel a flooding in of God’s peace. The crackers went on for some more time, but they didn’t bother me anymore. Joel also fell asleep.
The story doesn’t end here… The following evening was diwali celebration at the apartment complex, and Roshan had bought some no-noise stuff - sparklers and flower pots (‘kambithiri’, ‘poothiri’) – to light with the children. They went down and were enjoying lighting these with a friend’s family. One of the flowerpots suddenly caught fire and burst upon lighting - (must have been a faulty one – bcoz they are not supposed to burst), and a flame brushed close to Roshan’s face. They got a fright at first, but nothing had happened. Roshan came back and told me that it was divine protection that kept him safe - there were some parts of the burnt stuff stuck on his eyeglasses! Immediately I remembered (with shame and shock) what I had wished for the other family the previous night – the exact same thing could have happened to one of us now, if it had not been for God’s protection. It was a reminder and an example of God’s unconditional love and mercy and forgiveness….
All along the previous night, there was some part of the Bible coming to my mind, which said that we should never curse, only bless - but I had been shutting it off. I looked it up the next morning, and found it in Psalm 109:28 - ‘They may curse, but you will bless.’
It’s been more than a week now, but I have been thinking and reflecting on this a lot these days, and the verse ‘they may curse, but you will bless’ keeps coming to my mind – it says, ‘it doesn’t matter what others do, but you will do what I tell you to do’…….. ‘They may cheat, but you will not’; ‘They may gossip, but you will not’; ‘They may tell lies, but you will speak the truth’; …….. Yes, by being the chosen ones, isn’t it a privilege to be ordered around by the one who chose us? I love its commanding tone.
It is true, we have accepted the Lordship of Jesus in our lives - but now I also see how important it is to re-affirm this Lordship every single day - just to tell him over and over again that he does have the permission and right to hurry and rush to our rescue with his saving grace, when we get caught up in our weaknesses, like I was. When we entrust ourselves into his hands, he will somehow find his way through - however stubborn and turbulent our hearts may be at that time, like mine was…..
Praise God! Thank you, Jesus!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
